Unlock your team to scale, and exit. Free Culture Checklist.

6 Years Sober. Yesterday however…

The Drinks are 6 years behind me this month, but their pull shows up in other ways. I considered buying a 14,000 square foot church yesterday for instance

Of course our community needs a This Epic Life Temple. I mean, of course we do! I would go!

It’s that pull of abandoning our becoming to pursue the bigger, newer, shinier thing. I’ve been noticing the quality of things I say no to this year is better than what I would’ve killed to say yes to in years past.

Part of sobriety is an ability to declare HELL YES
to those precious few things, and a polite decline
to everything else.


Gayle’s tip of politely declining drinks in the moment (“Not right now. Maybe in a little bit”) has taken on a deeper meaning over the years. I’m wide open to the intoxicating romance of life. I love when it rattles me, turns me on my head, and tells me “you need this. You deserve this!” I’m slowly improving at seeing what’s just a sexy distraction.

Drinks or not, I’m still easily buzzed. It’s part of my magical Peter Pan thing. Possibility is in no short supply. LOL. There are infinite ways to spend a life time. I’ll take a few things I’ve started, and see them through to completion.

Soul. Vitality. Family. Art. Work.

I don’t recommend limiting the virtue of sobriety to only drinks / no drinks. We can get progressively more sober in every aspect of our lives. What does sobriety from anger look like, or impatience?

I’m more grateful for the absence of The Drinks in my life, than I ever was for the buzz, the glow, or the high on whatever I needed to be high on. I think I wanted life to glow in the dark.

Eventually we see that light must emanate from us.

I was either drowning, or hiding from mine.

I celebrated with a coaching client this morning, who’s finding deeper joy in being an extra-ordinary partier. His vice was tequila, and now one of his joys is mixology, for everyone but himself. Whether in-born rage, or margaritas: “Mock the devil, and he will flee from thee.”

6 years of leaving nothing behind, while embracing everything that was waiting for me. Deeper trust with my wife, better relationships with our kids… Surrendering to the Guru’s spiritual quest and discipline (sadhana).


My relationship with The Drinks was complicated, while what works is simple:

1 – Love and acknowledge Divinity, coursing throughout every facet of our lives.

2 – Work your Joy, in service to the greater good.

3 – Try to be someone you like to hang out with. Love will surround you on all sides.


This morning I meditated, got the kids out the door, and headed to the trails for a run. Inspired by a recent talk by Brother Chidananda, I quietly chanted while I ran: “Om. Tat. Sat.”

Om is sadhana, or the spiritual practice of hearing the sound of “om” in all creation. The creative aspect of God, the vibratory frequency unfolding the universe. Ohio has 1 billion shades of green this time of year. The “om” in my voice was resonating with nature, and I felt my becoming, right inside all the other living things down there. Everything within and without feels like it’s blooming.

Tat (‘taht’) is Truth, or the evidence of God in manifested form. We’re not passing tourists in a broken world. We are characters in a beautiful film.

Sat (‘saht’) is for Satsang, or Darshan. This is the spiritual blessing by a saintly form, typically in their physical presence. But when God and Guru work in omnipresence, their darshan bubbles up as our conscience.

As a ran, I conversed with the Guru. He’s the ultimate coach:

“What is it you want?”

“I want to carry out my mission to uplift consciousness.”

“What do you instruct others to do?

“Start where you are, and keep going.”

“Do you need this massive building to do that?”

“Uh, No?”

“Get back to work. You are needed where you are. God will make it obvious.”


As much as I loved the idea of owning, and running a temple in our community, it wasn’t in sobriety for me.

Today I’m seeing how 6 years beyond booze isn’t quite the same type of party. 😄

Paired down. Sharp-eyed. Awake.

//kc 05.18.18





Last night I dreamt our temple spilled into the street
After a day of lotus bliss on silent retreat
We floated off, wide-open hearts for anyone we’d meet
on New Year’s Eve

All of the bars had lines wrapped around the block
Every crowd a loud laughing drunk kinetic shock
and any face could have been mine
I smiled as I walked
through New Year’s Eve

All my drinking days
were all fun and games
’til my autopilot
lost it’s way

Tonight I shouldn’t lose my wallet or my keys
Just don’t assume I must’ve battled some hard disease
I’ll never judge you, or your hot pink daiquiris
not on New Year’s eve

All my drinking days
were all fun and games
’til my autopilot
lost it’s way

Kicking the drinks, one tiny baby step
Boring on paper but more radical the farther you get
There’s nowhere to hide when I’m triggered or upset
If the party’s over it hasn’t happened yet

No more wasted days
more fun and games
my autopilot
is out of my way

© 2018 Kristoffer Carter, ASCAP

Like this article?

Share on Facebook
Share on Twitter
Share on Linkdin
Share on Pinterest

Leave a comment

One Response

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *