Are we in the Vulnerability Trust Tree? Good.
Shooting and editing a 5-minute video selfie brings up a lot of mixed emotions.
The more I continue in my quest for meaning, the more the yogi in me demands to know the WHY behind my actions. Is this just a big ego stroke? What purpose does it serve? Are you still the same attention-starved kid you were in 4th grade?
The Funky Friday project started innocently enough. A couple months back my friend Mark shared the opening scene from HBO’s “Treme”, along with the simple words: “Have a Funky Friday, everyone!”
But that scene of post-Katrina musicians parading down a street in New Orleans got in my bones.
They were singing “Feel. Like. Funkin’ it UP. Feeel Like Funkin it Uppppp”. It touched some long-dormant funk strain inside of me. I felt compelled to share some grooves.
So, for the last few weeks I shot some iphone videos of different bass grooves. It has become a much-needed outlet, since so much of my work in education & development can be pretty serious.
At some point in the last few weeks I gave myself permission to entertain myself. To completely not give a shit about perfection, and to care deeply about kicking some joy.
Sounds a lot easier than it really is, because here’s the transparent list of Mind Garbage I need to conquer before I post a video each week:
1) You’re too old for this nonsense. What’s the “point”?
2) You care too much about how cool you look / sound.
3) You dropped a note in bar 2 of the chorus on that take.
4) People will think you’re obsessed with yourself.
5) Maybe you’re not nearly as funky as you think you are.
6) How hard are you trying to be The Cool Dad?
7) All your clients/coworkers will think you’ve lost your damn mind.
8) Remember that bad review of your singing voice back in 2001? That idiot critic was RIGHT.
9) Can’t you just form a band already?
10) If the meditation is all about expanding your consciousness, this vanity project keeps you tethered to your ego identity.
11) Gayle will think you’re having a midlife crisis.
12) You don’t even know how to produce / edit videos.
See what I mean? Hahaha. All the more reason to #MEDITATE.
Are you getting my point here? Putting yourself out on the Far Leading Edge isn’t easy. And yet, to expand we need to continually do so. We need feedback. We need to develop our craft. We need to start somewhere, while finishing whatever we started years ago.
We need to express our truth.
When I was writing my manifesto back in 2012, I realized I had never made myself so ridiculously vulnerable. Who the hell was I to articulate my philosophies on life? In that process there were a few lines that made me want to cry. Sometimes I did.
When it came to music, my first love, and first indication of strength… I wrote this:
Music taught me that life can be viewed from the top on down, standing above a labyrinth of frets and strings, seeing and hearing only possibilities: “Get in there and work it out, kid. Make people dance and enjoy themselves. Make sure you’re enjoying yourself.”
Because in exploring and articulating Our Truth, we come to a place Beyond The Why. It’s a place of feeling so deeply wrapped around our core that we drop the debate over what whoever will think. It just doesn’t matter.
We let it rip, because who else is going to? How else are we going to fully express ourselves? How else are we going to fully entertain ourselves?
Music became a bitter source of pain for me in my 20s. I was a classic cliche: the pissed-off, blocked artist. But as I slowly integrated music with my family, meditation, work, etc it has taken on a much bigger role in my life.
It’s not about entertaining other people, (although I completely love it when it does!) It’s about synthesizing seemingly disparate concepts and information into a meaningful tapestry. You can stack the non-negotiables in your life like a DJ stacks loops. And the glitches are all good, because rhythmic or sonic dissonance makes it interesting.
There’s beauty and authenticity in that tension. Any foolish kid can only chase perfection. Trust me, I did it for years. One of my favorite Brene Brown quotes: “perfection is a 10 ton shield we use for protection, when in reality it only keeps us from being seen.”
So before I share this week’s Big Vulnerability Challenge, I challenge you:
What BS excuses or fears are keeping you from letting it rip? Trust me, the world needs all that magic inside of you.
We’re all ears, leaning in.